The Mysterious Case of the River Rats and the Smelly Cat

Constable from the village of Saint Genevieve had been investigating a string of strange occurrences in the rural area, but nothing could have prepared him for the bizarre tale that unfolded before him. The story began with a visit to the humble abode of a poor couple living in the middle of the woods. The Constable had received complaints about rent payments being missed, and he had decided to pay a visit to see if there was any truth to these allegations.

As the Constable entered the home, he was greeted by the smell of cooking soup and the sight of a peculiar gathering of bones and spoons. The couple, who introduced themselves as Ron and Foreign, seemed nervous and agitated, but they were more than happy to explain their situation. It turned out that they had been living in the woods for some time, and they claimed to have discovered a strange phenomenon - a cat that was unlike any other.

According to Ron, the Smelly Cat was a malevolent creature that roamed the woods, attacking anyone who crossed its path. But what made this story even more astonishing was the claim that Ron had used a leg bone and a mixing spoon to defend himself against the beast. The Constable was skeptical at first, but Ron's tale seemed so improbable that he couldn't help but be intrigued.

As the conversation continued, the Constable began to notice strange markings on Ron's face, which appeared to be some sort of ritualistic symbols. Foreign, Ron's companion, seemed just as unusual, with bruises and scratches covering his body. The Constable asked if they had been involved in any sort of dark magic, but Ron denied it, insisting that the Smelly Cat was a real creature.

The conversation took a turn for the bizarre when Foreign revealed that he had found a skull in the woods, which he claimed belonged to their late grandmother, Nancy Rose. According to Foreign, this was some sort of new tradition among the woodspeople - keeping the heads of deceased relatives as a sort of macabre souvenir. The Constable was perplexed by this explanation and couldn't help but wonder if Ron and Foreign were spinning a web of deceit.

As the interview drew to a close, the Constable asked if he could take a closer look at the skull. Foreign hesitated, then handed it over, saying that it was all part of their "new weird country tradition." The Constable couldn't help but feel that something was off about this encounter, and his instincts told him that Ron and Foreign were hiding something from him.

As he prepared to leave, the Constable asked if they had any idea who might be responsible for the recent vandalism in the area. Ron claimed that it was just the River Rats, a group of outlaws who had been causing trouble in the woods. The Constable wasn't convinced, and his suspicions only grew as he watched Ron and Foreign hastily depart.

As the door closed behind them, the Constable couldn't help but wonder if he had stumbled into something much larger than himself. The tale of the Smelly Cat and the River Rats was already beginning to take on a life of its own in his mind, and he knew that this case would be anything but easy to crack.

"WEBVTTKind: captionsLanguage: enwhile I am gone I have made arrangements you should pay your rent to my cousin Francois as I said earlier an agreement over turnips that is not valid here come next month to you was twenty five dollars sorry I told us to go off that stream well now our shipstepped because of you well it won't happen again yeah it won't sure would like to get back to the Caribbean yeah well because of you we're not there right now we're going to bury the treasure up here so when we get done with the Caribbean we're gonna come back yes so we're not going to take the same damn river that you told us to come on yes sir let's bury it down here I don't feel like going any further foreign how we gonna mark it I know how to mark it no no don't worry I'll leave you a tombstone Ron I am so embarrassed that we were a penny short for milk at the market all the women are gonna start talking about us in town I know how a woman are what are they gonna talk about how we can't afford even a cup of milk now Money's been terrible lately well it's not winter people aren't burning wood as much you know what are you expect me to do I can't make them buy it what's for dinner tonight looks like celery celery what's for dinner tomorrow celery it was for dinner yesterday celery celery yeah I just feel like that treasure is under my feet I feel like it's around here but I I don't know exactly where it's at it's incredibly frustrating but I know it exists I know it's around here and if we could just find it we wouldn't be a penny short for milk at the market because we could buy the whole cow well we just keep looking all right all right and Winter's coming it's not far off all right possible what brings you these parts got myself a chicken Thief Jim Fox can I troubles you for a glass of water horse constable but he has to stay outside see all these chickens when I come back out they better all still be out here ain't nothing worse than a chicken Thief foreign thanks for coming through you've been busy lately it's always busy in this town what's going on more River wrestling there's ever been they just keep coming up to Mississippi I noticed that too why do they keep coming up they keep saying something about some treasure yeah I know all about that treasure of course you know about that treasure knowing The Company You Keep wait what do you know about the treasure I know my brother went looking for it he went down that well I haven't seen him in three months what well we want about three miles north of here don't listen to that chicken Thief out there he hasn't told the truth in yours man we've been walking for hours can I try to eat for a piece of bread oh I don't know if I have it I'll go look though here's a loaf nope nope right here foreign Constable there's no bread fit for human consumption in this house mines have been tough you want some more water no no I'm fine I I've got my chicken Thief out there that I have to tend to oh I'll probably be paying you a visit later oh thanks for the visit take care yeah you've been behaving out here of course stranger remember to try and I Trope a lot tighter than that if you don't tie good knots get on down here chicky where's that chicken look at that chicken alone drop that wood what I got another tip about treasure oh another dead end I'm tired maybe or maybe not it better not be in our wild goose chase 45 you're over exaggerating I can't count oh come on it's got to be around here somewhere have we seen that before no what's that well I'll be the old man was right yes he was there is a well out here little nowhere awfully deep I can't see the bottom of Iran it's really deep hello oh now what I didn't think it was going to be this deep well I brought this torch I'll light it I'll drop it in there and I'll show you my rear end down the hole seriously think you're gonna down there I thought I fed you suck it in good let's see how deep it is first all right oh we're gonna count see how far down it goes let's do it foreign okay four seconds it was gonna get her Ron are you sure about this are you sure about this not real sure but we need that money bad I don't think that's gonna hold your weight this thing looks like it's 200 years old Rhonda is not going to hold your weight I don't think so I need you Ron I don't want you to die I'll do it are you sure no I'm not sure but we need that money all right come over here and I will lift you up have you ever climbed a rope before no and I've never read about it in a book oh this is scary just keep one hand above the other oh there's spider webs all over it wrong give me my hat I don't know what's down there what's that yeah I don't want to get any more bug bites on my way down how are you gonna tell all your friends I was the best woman you ever met I sure will but you're coming back alive because I need you as well all right hey there's something else in this bag there ain't no cooking to be done down there I know what I'm doing a look if there's a big old spider down there he's about to get the back of this spoon oh good luck if you need help yelling I'll jump down uh you're not jumping down that it's only 20 foot you guys look Easy Does It yeah just keep on going oh Ron you've dropped me bigger down here than I thought oh foreign taggy foreign get out of me Ron pull me up get me out of here no more cornbread woman what are you packing you're almost there Easy Does It put your arms around me I mean I'm tired he smells something foul what was all that hollering going on down there what was that have a rest oh what happened down there almost died in that whole run I almost died died in that hole what's on your face you got Morts all over you take me home yes ma'am testing hun I want to talk about what happened down that well when I pulled you up you had three things with you yeah your favorite mixing spoon oh yes yes and then I don't know where you got this it appears to be a leg from a man what was down in that well this bone saved my life Ron I kept hitting that Smelly Cat over and over and over there was a bunch of Bones down there a bunch of Bones The Smelly Cat it was eating people and it tried to eat meat but I had this bone I had this spoon and that's why I'm still here today how big was that well down there okay there was one other thing I brought up yeah it makes noise I haven't opened it yet whoa foreign your husband home no sir well sorry to bother you but I got to come and speak to you anyway care if I come in I'd never say no to Constable come in gathering I have some soup on the fire I can offer you just a little bit I'm sorry I don't have any more oh that would be nice I would greatly appreciate that I have a seat comfortable I'll get that ready for you right away man you look a little different do you come into some harm recently oh these bruises don't mind these I just got attacked by a skunk recently it's a long story a skunk yes it happens now this is just some bean and salted pork soup I'm sorry I can't offer you any more than that oh that's fine I hope you like it here we go pound School thank you now Constable you have to ask why are you here not that I don't want you here or anything do you remember me telling you about the river as and how there's been so many yes sir well under the right conditions those River Rats talk they've been scoping your house after quite some time now do you have any clue why because I'm not paying agreed upon rent and are they the ones who cause that harm no sir I swear I got attacked by a really smelly looking cat I know you country folk are kind of strange but you're gonna have to give me a better story if you want me to believe that so you mind telling me why you had some dead person's head in your house the other day how do you know about that well I was helping you look for bread the other day and it was right there on the table you denied it very well it was just under a cloth uh Constable um that's my late Grandma Nancy Nancy Rose she was my best friend as a kid and when she passed on I just couldn't bear to leave her in that dirt so I I just took her with me so it's some sort of new weird country tradition you just keep the heads of your dead relatives lying around it's a tradition in this house Constable what do you want me to say man I work for the village of Saint Genevieve and there is a lot of crime in this town now I don't believe this story that you're telling me you're hiding something from me and I'm gonna find out what it is Council I'm not hiding anything from you I'm just me and my partner are just two poor people living out in the middle of the woods and uh constantly you don't gotta look around or anything there's nothing to see here I swear my grandma's skull was it uh yep definitely nothing to see over there constable that's nothing Constable that's just a new kind of spoon a new kind of spoon you're too poor people living in the middle of the woods how'd you afford meat for this soup and where is the rest of your grandmother are you a witch no sir I don't appreciate you handling Nancy Rose like that either I'm just a good cook would you like more soup say is this where the rest of your grandmother is no that's just some salt pork see I'll prove it to you oh you are demented man I'm getting out of here before you turn me into soup too don't let the door hit you on the way out Constable I'm fishing the priest on my way back byewhile I am gone I have made arrangements you should pay your rent to my cousin Francois as I said earlier an agreement over turnips that is not valid here come next month to you was twenty five dollars sorry I told us to go off that stream well now our shipstepped because of you well it won't happen again yeah it won't sure would like to get back to the Caribbean yeah well because of you we're not there right now we're going to bury the treasure up here so when we get done with the Caribbean we're gonna come back yes so we're not going to take the same damn river that you told us to come on yes sir let's bury it down here I don't feel like going any further foreign how we gonna mark it I know how to mark it no no don't worry I'll leave you a tombstone Ron I am so embarrassed that we were a penny short for milk at the market all the women are gonna start talking about us in town I know how a woman are what are they gonna talk about how we can't afford even a cup of milk now Money's been terrible lately well it's not winter people aren't burning wood as much you know what are you expect me to do I can't make them buy it what's for dinner tonight looks like celery celery what's for dinner tomorrow celery it was for dinner yesterday celery celery yeah I just feel like that treasure is under my feet I feel like it's around here but I I don't know exactly where it's at it's incredibly frustrating but I know it exists I know it's around here and if we could just find it we wouldn't be a penny short for milk at the market because we could buy the whole cow well we just keep looking all right all right and Winter's coming it's not far off all right possible what brings you these parts got myself a chicken Thief Jim Fox can I troubles you for a glass of water horse constable but he has to stay outside see all these chickens when I come back out they better all still be out here ain't nothing worse than a chicken Thief foreign thanks for coming through you've been busy lately it's always busy in this town what's going on more River wrestling there's ever been they just keep coming up to Mississippi I noticed that too why do they keep coming up they keep saying something about some treasure yeah I know all about that treasure of course you know about that treasure knowing The Company You Keep wait what do you know about the treasure I know my brother went looking for it he went down that well I haven't seen him in three months what well we want about three miles north of here don't listen to that chicken Thief out there he hasn't told the truth in yours man we've been walking for hours can I try to eat for a piece of bread oh I don't know if I have it I'll go look though here's a loaf nope nope right here foreign Constable there's no bread fit for human consumption in this house mines have been tough you want some more water no no I'm fine I I've got my chicken Thief out there that I have to tend to oh I'll probably be paying you a visit later oh thanks for the visit take care yeah you've been behaving out here of course stranger remember to try and I Trope a lot tighter than that if you don't tie good knots get on down here chicky where's that chicken look at that chicken alone drop that wood what I got another tip about treasure oh another dead end I'm tired maybe or maybe not it better not be in our wild goose chase 45 you're over exaggerating I can't count oh come on it's got to be around here somewhere have we seen that before no what's that well I'll be the old man was right yes he was there is a well out here little nowhere awfully deep I can't see the bottom of Iran it's really deep hello oh now what I didn't think it was going to be this deep well I brought this torch I'll light it I'll drop it in there and I'll show you my rear end down the hole seriously think you're gonna down there I thought I fed you suck it in good let's see how deep it is first all right oh we're gonna count see how far down it goes let's do it foreign okay four seconds it was gonna get her Ron are you sure about this are you sure about this not real sure but we need that money bad I don't think that's gonna hold your weight this thing looks like it's 200 years old Rhonda is not going to hold your weight I don't think so I need you Ron I don't want you to die I'll do it are you sure no I'm not sure but we need that money all right come over here and I will lift you up have you ever climbed a rope before no and I've never read about it in a book oh this is scary just keep one hand above the other oh there's spider webs all over it wrong give me my hat I don't know what's down there what's that yeah I don't want to get any more bug bites on my way down how are you gonna tell all your friends I was the best woman you ever met I sure will but you're coming back alive because I need you as well all right hey there's something else in this bag there ain't no cooking to be done down there I know what I'm doing a look if there's a big old spider down there he's about to get the back of this spoon oh good luck if you need help yelling I'll jump down uh you're not jumping down that it's only 20 foot you guys look Easy Does It yeah just keep on going oh Ron you've dropped me bigger down here than I thought oh foreign taggy foreign get out of me Ron pull me up get me out of here no more cornbread woman what are you packing you're almost there Easy Does It put your arms around me I mean I'm tired he smells something foul what was all that hollering going on down there what was that have a rest oh what happened down there almost died in that whole run I almost died died in that hole what's on your face you got Morts all over you take me home yes ma'am testing hun I want to talk about what happened down that well when I pulled you up you had three things with you yeah your favorite mixing spoon oh yes yes and then I don't know where you got this it appears to be a leg from a man what was down in that well this bone saved my life Ron I kept hitting that Smelly Cat over and over and over there was a bunch of Bones down there a bunch of Bones The Smelly Cat it was eating people and it tried to eat meat but I had this bone I had this spoon and that's why I'm still here today how big was that well down there okay there was one other thing I brought up yeah it makes noise I haven't opened it yet whoa foreign your husband home no sir well sorry to bother you but I got to come and speak to you anyway care if I come in I'd never say no to Constable come in gathering I have some soup on the fire I can offer you just a little bit I'm sorry I don't have any more oh that would be nice I would greatly appreciate that I have a seat comfortable I'll get that ready for you right away man you look a little different do you come into some harm recently oh these bruises don't mind these I just got attacked by a skunk recently it's a long story a skunk yes it happens now this is just some bean and salted pork soup I'm sorry I can't offer you any more than that oh that's fine I hope you like it here we go pound School thank you now Constable you have to ask why are you here not that I don't want you here or anything do you remember me telling you about the river as and how there's been so many yes sir well under the right conditions those River Rats talk they've been scoping your house after quite some time now do you have any clue why because I'm not paying agreed upon rent and are they the ones who cause that harm no sir I swear I got attacked by a really smelly looking cat I know you country folk are kind of strange but you're gonna have to give me a better story if you want me to believe that so you mind telling me why you had some dead person's head in your house the other day how do you know about that well I was helping you look for bread the other day and it was right there on the table you denied it very well it was just under a cloth uh Constable um that's my late Grandma Nancy Nancy Rose she was my best friend as a kid and when she passed on I just couldn't bear to leave her in that dirt so I I just took her with me so it's some sort of new weird country tradition you just keep the heads of your dead relatives lying around it's a tradition in this house Constable what do you want me to say man I work for the village of Saint Genevieve and there is a lot of crime in this town now I don't believe this story that you're telling me you're hiding something from me and I'm gonna find out what it is Council I'm not hiding anything from you I'm just me and my partner are just two poor people living out in the middle of the woods and uh constantly you don't gotta look around or anything there's nothing to see here I swear my grandma's skull was it uh yep definitely nothing to see over there constable that's nothing Constable that's just a new kind of spoon a new kind of spoon you're too poor people living in the middle of the woods how'd you afford meat for this soup and where is the rest of your grandmother are you a witch no sir I don't appreciate you handling Nancy Rose like that either I'm just a good cook would you like more soup say is this where the rest of your grandmother is no that's just some salt pork see I'll prove it to you oh you are demented man I'm getting out of here before you turn me into soup too don't let the door hit you on the way out Constable I'm fishing the priest on my way back bye\n"