**Introduction to "Don't Spill Your Coffee"**

In this hilarious and entertaining game, players take on the role of a clumsy individual trying to navigate various obstacles without spilling their coffee. The game's title, "Don't Spill Your Coffee," speaks for itself, but the experience is anything but straightforward. As our protagonist navigates through the game's challenging levels, they must contend with increasingly complex controls and absurdly designed environments.

**The Early Stages of the Game**

As we begin the game, our protagonist finds themselves standing in front of a seemingly ordinary turnstile. However, as soon as they attempt to walk through it, their attempts at normalcy are foiled by the realization that their body has a mind of its own. Their buttocks seem to have developed a life of their own, and the player must adjust their movements accordingly. The early stages of the game serve as a learning curve for the player, introducing them to the game's core mechanics and challenges.

**The Turnstile Challenge**

One of the most memorable moments in the game comes when our protagonist attempts to walk through a turnstile while simultaneously trying to control their buttocks. The controls are finicky, and the player must use a combination of button presses and strategic positioning to successfully navigate the turnstile. As the game progresses, the difficulty level increases, and the player must adapt to new challenges and obstacles.

**The Coffee Break**

As our protagonist continues through the game, they take a moment to pause and enjoy their coffee. However, it soon becomes apparent that the coffee has been spiked with an unknown substance, causing the player's movements to become increasingly erratic. This sudden change in behavior adds a layer of unpredictability to the game, making it even more challenging for the player.

**The Terminal Raising Segment**

As our protagonist nears the end of their journey, they encounter a segment of the game that seems almost impossible to complete. The terminal raising challenge requires the player to raise and lower their buttocks in perfect sync with the environment, all while maintaining control over their movements. This segment serves as a true test of the player's skills and patience.

**The Final Stretch**

With the terminal raising challenge behind them, our protagonist enters the final stretch of the game. The player must navigate through a series of increasingly complex obstacles, all while keeping their cool (or at least attempting to). As they near the end of the game, the player can't help but feel a sense of accomplishment and pride in their ability to persevere through such absurd challenges.

**Conclusion**

After completing the game, our protagonist reflects on the experience with a mix of relief and amusement. The game's ridiculous premise and challenging controls serve as a testament to its unique charm. As the credits roll, it becomes clear that "Don't Spill Your Coffee" is not just a game – it's an immersive experience that will leave players laughing and entertained for hours on end.

"WEBVTTKind: captionsLanguage: enHello Everybody! My name is Markflondam! Welcome to Don't Spill Your Coffee!Now as far as silly little games go this is probably the silliest little game that I could possibly find... BUT JUST IMAGINE THE SCENARIO!You're walking to work! 'Cause that's what you do, you walk to work with your coffee in hand!Its not even in, like, a mug or a thermos, you stupidly put it in a cup from your home.But, y-y-you, its too early in the morning! You haven't had you coffee yet, and you gotta get to work cause you're running late.THEN ALL OF THE SUDDEN, GRAVITY BETRAYS YOU, EVERYTHING GONE WRONG, THE FOUR....THE FLOOR...But anyway, theres like fifteen levels to this game, and then customization options, and I don- uh- I don- I don't know, I've played around with it,and there's various different hair options, and um, I kinda like the pigtails! Not gonna lie not gonna lie. Diggin' the pigtails...And also a beard...cuz pigtails and beard, is best comboyeah, that looks good, change the skin color, oh that's weird.Its like Squidward if he grew pigtails... and a beard.Can I have a nose customization? Could i extend this nose out? please?Okay, lets assume this guy has no grundle, and...just decided to forget his pants.It's a very early morning! I mean when the floor is rebeling against you and gravity decided to fuck with your mind,And then cthulu pops through the door, it's gonna be a rough day for you.So anyway let's get to it. I actually have never played this game before in my life,and this guy looks like-- oh my god,(laugh)WHY ARE YOU S- WHY IS HE THRUSTING?? WHY IS HE THRUSTING INTO THE GROUND??DUDE..........STOP??Ok lets try this agai-He's just- he's just dumping coffee into his face-(imitating character)Oh wow...yeah this is good for lumbar support (laughing)Alright, oh, I can walk! With my HUMAN legs.Oh! I can try to not spill my HUMAN coffeeLemme just thrust upwards, holy shit!What the fuck is happening (laugh)If I- if I- if I was taking this more seriously, I'd be frustrated with the controlsLet us take this, one step at a time with my FLORGON feet!-I mean HUMAN feet...OK!Oh oh oh oh ohuhhh, ok, just gotta get through this turnstile, apparently, let's go!THROUGH THE HUMAN CONTROL DEVICEA- Oh, shit!I don't know what's happeningWhat- why did this not work...HEHEEYOk, em, lemme just spill that on my crotch, my nonexistent crotchHup, I gotta....also how do I.....do I.......I don't know what to do!Do I use the door device? Ahhhhh very smart-Okay....HANG ON! I got this. WHOAP....HIP, there we GO!Shit! Nope! I got it!Don't worry about it! I can get back up from this!I CAN RECOVER!(strange noises)Is this how hard it is to actually human?Oh key card, OHHHHHHHHThe key card's in my butt!I gotta put my butt up to this thing, I get it now!Okay. So I just gotta.... back dat ass up!Into the key card dispensaryBOOPADOOPoh, what, AHHHHIt froze on me! That wasn't my fault, it fricking froze!I gotta do the RAGE worm!Aah, the game's against me!LIFE, IMPRISONING ME!ALL THAT I SEE, ABSOLUTE SAVINGS, WHAT A GREAT DEAL, WHAT A GREAT BUY,Lets try that again! Cause I know what I'm doing now!Gah just get that! Hang on! Don't Worry!I got it! 100%! In it to win it!Just gotta bow...y'know..every once and a while, pay my respects to the dead...You know, spill out some coffee for those we have lost in this endeavor.back up, back up, back up,whoof, whoof.turn, back up, there we go!forward! oh boy..TURNWhoa... This is awfully hard ( (ʘ ͜ʖʘ) )WOAH this is harder that you think guys! ( (ò ͜ʖó) )Woah... Woah, that's not,Ah fuck!Aaah gimme that! I'm so close!IM SO TANTALIZINGLY CLOSE!(Markimoo's incoherent shout of anger)Alriiiight! Alriiiiight! ALRIIIGHT!DAAAAA I DID IT!I'M GETTING A VICTORY CAFFEINE BOOSTYeah motherfuckers! Whaa, get in my belly!Okay..You made it to your meeting you had great ideas press 'A' to go to the next oneAlright I'll try one more but I don't knowUh, I don't know how this is gonna go-Oh, I think this is s'possed- Shadow play?What's that mean?This doesn't exactly make it very difficult...Just put it in a different spotMmm, back dat ass up, fuck!I'm in it to win it! (Gibberish)I'm in it to win it! I'm in it to win it! YeahNormal human!Normal human through the normal human turnstyle!COFFEE! YES!Awh shit-Wha- Oh god, how am I supposed to be able to do that?I don't have- whoops, shitUh oh OHEOHohO-oh oh oh OH OH(laughing)OOHOh okay!There's other controls!(laughing)Get it! Get it, man!Ge- (laughing) Get it!YEAAHHYEAAAHHWell I was always hoping that I'd have this intimate control over my buttocksI'm glad that this day has finally...come to meOkay... yepLower it.. Oh, hoh hohLower it... Lower itOOOAH! okayLet's try to get through it. Like this! YeahThat's normal... mmm!My normal HUMAN walking poseYes! Have a good day lovely fellow HUMANS!Let me just journey my massive booty through the turnstyleMMMMM. Doesnt seem to be-There we are!Yes!It's actually a little easier to walk this way!Fuck yeah!OkayVertically challenged, I don't know what tha- Fuck itIs this, is this saying that I can raise my butt into the air..?(grunt)Get it up... Ah, fuck!(laughing)Ah shit, dude!Ah, fuck dude!Ah, welp. Just gonna crab it!Over here in the cornerNo one mind me while I gently do my hip extension exercisesEh ehRaise it. Raise it.Now lean back- Raise it, raise it, raise it-Lean back...le- lean this wayRaise itRaise itOh shitWe're getting to terminal... Ass... extensionAh shit. Gotta back dat ass upBack it up(scream)Okay- Try to make it- Like this nowNormal HUMAN!Ah fuck!Terminal raisingDoot- a- loopGot it..Woah, hey- Ease up thereDrop it down, drop dat assDat ass is outta controlyou drop that down nowyou drop that down nowDrop- ohohahwohGood thing I'm up against the wallDrop it down drop it down drop it downDrop it down!Drop it down!!Little more!Now that's in controlThat's what I call in control.Not reallyWoah very drunkEh, I spiked my coffee with a lot of vodka before-Nope, whoa whoa whoahepAh shit, God dammit!Ah, good thing I can get my ass up!There we goLemme just-Doodaleedoop doop!Doodaleedoop doop!Eh fuck- Why!! Why there!I trip over my own feet, it's not my fault!So I just gotta raise it up and then immediately raise it downCuz that's how you say 'raising down'- Woah, heyLet me go throughWoah- nah- woah- de- fuckGo! Just go for it!GOOOOOMAKE A BREAK FOR ITRUUNYeaaah- ShitAh fuck(gibberish)So anyway, that's all the time I got for 'Don't Spill Your Coffee'This game is actually pretty much delightfulI love this,I love stupid ideas like thisif you guys got more cool games that I can play like thislet me know in the comments belowso thank you everybody so much for watchingand as always,I will see you... In the next videoBuh- bye!\n"