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Well, that is the weirdest-looking floppy disk ever. Uh. Oh, hey. That's convenient! (groans) Your cat is green. (speaking foreign language) What the hell? Gah. Goodmorning, Krazy Ken. You need to steal the iMac Pro from Jony Ive's white room. This message will self-destruct in three, two. -(panicked muttering) Phew. - One. Yeagh! (exploding) (up-tempo spy music) (alarm bell ringing) (chirping and scanning) Phew. Where am I? Is this it? (beeping) (typing) (upbeat electronic music) Come on, where is the light switch in here? Oh, there it is.

So as you can see, ladies and gentlemen, I have infiltrated the hidden fortress of Jonathan Ive and entered into his white room of secrets. All just today to unbox the most expensive product I have ever unboxed on this show: a USB-C dongle. I mean, seriously! These dongles cost shit-ton of money! I mean, I can't really blame Apple. There is a controller inside of here. There's actually a lot that goes into these things, and I've used third-party dongles that are cheaper before, and they all suck big duck. So I'm gonna be sticking with the Apple brand, thank you very much, I don't care how much it costs. I need it.

But that is not really the reason I called you all here today. Dongles aside, I'm actually gonna unbox and setup this beautiful iMac Pro with 14 cores. 14 mother... (censor bleep) cores! Like, I can't even think of what I do that would require that much power. But we have 'em anyway. So 14 cores, Xeon, 128 gigabytes of RAM, the Vega chips for the GPU, all inside a convenient, super-easy to open and upgrade package. You'll see the humor in that later.

Alright, one thing I like about Apple is they really make simple box designs. Unlike some other ones I've opened earlier which required like a blow torch, Apple actually makes their packaging really beautiful and really easy to open, and environmentally friendly. So, EPA, they're thinking about you. Anyhoo, let's flip this open. And it comes down the other way. Very anti-climactic. I'm gonna flip this bitch around. Boy, what a great idea it was to film this on a tablecloth. It's so easy to work with.

♪Duh-duh. (sings theme to 2001: A Space Odyssey) ♪Space Odyssey. That's the screen. Beautiful resolution. This looks like our little accessory box. Oh, just slides right out. Boom. Black power cord. When Apple does black stuff, it's always special. That was it. Oh. It was literally just for the power cord. Okay, we'll just set that right there.

Anyone want some toast? Just pops right out of... (censor bleep) Well, alright, we know how durable that little tag is now, we learned that. Um, yeah, that was not good. I'm sure it's not broken, but whoa, what a great start. Anyway. This I'm really excited for because this is most likely, judging by the shape, the exclusive space gray, wireless MagicKeyboard and mouse, which only comes with the iMac Pro, or on eBay, for like hundreds of dollars. Probably thousands of dollars.

Do a slide-out, like that. Oooh. That looks pretty cool. Oh... (sniffs) you can get high off of new Apple product. It just smells like fresh science. Look at that. Unwrap it. Dude. This is the shit. I'm not a huge fan of numeric keypads honestly, but man, this looks great. And it's thin. All space gray. It'd be cool if it was backlit, but I'm typically working in a lit environment anyway.

Very frikin' nice. That looks good. And let us not forget the Magic Mouse 2, space gray. And it's own little space gray, little pouch. Dude. Lots of cool videos are gonna be cut with this bad boy. Remember when Steve Jobs introduced the Puck Mouse and said...

"WEBVTTKind: captionsLanguage: en- What's this?Well, that is the weirdestlooking floppy disk ever.Uh.Oh, hey.That's convenient!(groans)-Your cat is green.(speaking foreign language)- What the hell?Gah.- Goodmorning, Krazy Ken.You need to steal the iMac Profrom Jony Ive's white room.This message willself-destruct in three, two.-(panicked muttering)Phew.- One.- Yeagh!(exploding)(up-tempo spy music)(alarm bell ringing)(chirping and scanning)Phew.Where am I?Is this it?(beeping)(typing)(upbeat electronic music)Come on, where is thelight switch in here?Oh, there it is.So as you can see,ladies and gentlemen,I have infiltrated the hiddenfortress of Jonathan Iveand entered in to hiswhite room of secrets.All just today to unboxthe most expensive productI have ever unboxedon this show:A USB-C dongle.I mean, seriously!These dongles costa shit-ton of money!I mean, I can'treally blame Apple.There is a controllerinside of here.There's actually a lotthat goes into these thingsand I've used somethird-party donglesthat are cheaper beforeand they all suck big duck.So I'm gonna be stickingwith the Apple brand,thank you very much, I don'tcare how much it costs.I need it.But that is notreally the reasonI called you all here today.So dongles aside, I'mactually gonna unboxand setup this beautifuliMac Pro with 14 cores.14 mother (censor bleep) cores!Like, I can't even think of whatI do that would requirethat much power.But, we have 'em anyway.So 14 cores, Xeon,128 gigabytes of RAM,the Vega chips forthe GPU, all insidea convenient, super-easy toopen and upgrade package.You'll see thehumor in that later.Alright, one thingI like about Appleis they really makesimple box designs.Unlike some other onesI've opened earlierwhich requiredlike a blow torch,Apple actually makes theirpackaging really beautifuland really easy to open, andenvironmentally friendly.So, EPA, they'rethinkin' about you.Anyhoo, let's flip this open.And it comes down the other way.Very anti-climactic.I'm gonna flipthis bitch around.Boy, what a great idea it wasto film this on a tablecloth.It's so easy to work with.Anyhoo.♪Duh-duh. (sings theme to2001: A Space Odyssey) ♪Space Odyssey.That's the screen.Beautiful resolution.This looks like ourlittle accessory box.Oh, just slides right out.Boom.Black power cord.When Apple does blackstuff, it's always special.That was it.Oh.It was literally justfor the power cord.Okay, we'll just setthat right there.Anyone want some toast?Just pops right out ofthe, oh (censor bleep)Well (laughter) alright,we know how durablethat little tag isnow, we learned that.Um, yeah, that was not good.I'm sure it's notbroken, but (laughter)whoa, what a great start.Anyway.This I'm really excited for,because this is most likely,judging by the shape,the exclusive spacegray, wireless MagicKeyboard and mouse,which only comes withthe iMac Pro, or on eBay,for like, hundreds of dollars.Probably thousands of dollars.Do a slide-out, like that.Oooh.That looks pretty cool.Oh (sniffs) you can get highoff of new Apple product.It just smellslike fresh science.Look at that.Unwrap it.Dude.This is the shit.I'm not a huge fan ofnumeric keypads honestly,but man, this looks great.And it's thin.All space gray.It'd be cool if it was backlit,but I'm typically workingin a lit environment anyway.Very frikin' nice.That looks good.And let us not forget theMagic Mouse 2, space gray.And it's own littlespace gray, little pouch.Dude.Lots of cool videos are gonnabe cut with this bad boy.Remember when Steve Jobsintroduced the Puck Mouseand said \"This was thecoolest mouse on the planet\"?This is the coolestmouse on the planet.And it won't give youcarpal tunnel syndromelike the other one did.I mean, the puck shape,who thought of that idea?Yeah, this is pretty baller.This is pretty freakin'awesome, look at that!They even give you alightning cable that's blackto charge the black accessories.Now if only they would shipmore black Thunderbolt cables,that'd be great, butyeah, included lightning.Awesome.Got another little package.The iMac Pro.Oooh.Black Apple Stickers.Hello!Have they done that before?I feel like they have.You see the whiteones everywhere, Igot black ones now!Oh freaking yeah.And of course a cleaningcloth, which is always black.That was alreadyblack to begin with.I'm trying to determine howto approach this unboxingwithout shatteringeverything in sight.(grunts) Oh, yeah,that's, that feels good.Just gonna carefully set downthe almost $10,000 computer.Let's go.Make way for thestar of the show.I'm just admiring thisbeautiful aluminum.The black aluminum,and uh, yeah.To go with it, they have thisdarker wrapper on it too,which is a nice little touch.Man, this thingjust feels amazing.There's so much horsepowerwith the 5k displaypacked into somethingthat's so thinand just tilts with no effort.Let's pop the cherryand unwrap it like alittle Christmas present.A little $10,000Christmas present.I'm sorry. I'm just likea space gray addict.It's like a drug.And one, two three,boom!There it is!The beautiful iMac Pro.With wrap on the front,yes, let's remove that.Okay, I just wanna say, I'vesaid this before on Krazy Ken,peeling this protectiveplastic off of new technologyis like the bestfeeling in the world.And I'm about to do it withthe most expensive gizmoI've ever touched, soI'm going ta savor this.This might be anhour-long sequence,and I'm gonna disablethe fast-forward buttonso you can't skip.You're just gonna sitthere and watch meun-peel this for an hour.Oh, this is better than whatI've been told sex feels like.Oh gosh.Oh mama!That was good.And that was just one of 'em!It looks like there's more.Oh, it ripped in half.That's beautiful.Let's do the other half.It ripped in half on purposejust so I can savor the momentOw! Electric shock,you bitch, ow.Don't do that to me.I really don't wannatouch the screen.And there's evenmore to peel off.They had that on theApple on the back.Keep that shiny.This is just un-freakin'believably beautiful.It really is like a statueor like a modern pieceof art on your desk,like I don't evenwanna touch it.This is the mostbeautiful, finely craftedcomputer I've ever seen.Seriously.Let's take a look at the ports.Well, we have a headphonejack, which is great,that didn't get removed.SD Card.4 USB-3s, I'm guessingthose are three Type Aand then we have C whichis also Thunderbolt-3,which is really awesomebecause I'm also gonna be usinga Thunderbolt 3 RAIDSystem with this.And our ethernet, so yeah,lots of good ports on hereand some backwardscompatibility, which is great.And in the central-holethere is the power.And on the foot we haveeven more awesome wrappingto pull-off and savorthose moments ofpeeling that stuffoff, it's so much fun.So I'm gonna savethat for later!Mhmmm.It still smellslike fresh Apple.Alright, we are all plugged in.What do you say?Give it a boot-up?Next time, on KrazyKen's Tech Misadventures!Just kidding!I wouldn't make you waitfor a Part Two just tosee the thing turn on.That would be adick-ish marketing move.Right?There's no way I'd do that.Promise.Now, before I boot it up, Ihave a question for all of you:Personally, I'm afan of darker things,dark themes in software,black products,even my iPhone isfrickin' jet black,I held out for that oneand spent the extra moneyto get the upsell,but what is it?What do you think itis about black things,exclusivity aside,what is it aboutdarker products that a lotof us gravitate toward?I know not everybodylikes the black stuff.But I know many do.So what is it?I'm not even quite sure.What I will sayabout this, though,is that the space graychassis kind of blends betterwith the screen and thebezel, making it lookmore like a unified shape,and the way the light reactswith the contours is justso freakin' beautiful,and I love it!But I'm just wondering,what do you guys think?What is it about blackthings like phones,computers, software skinsthat makes us go crazy?Anyway, here we go, the firstboot of the 14 core whore,that was for youAdiblasi, iMac Pro.(eMate 300 startup chime)(television signalling)(Mac startup chime)Alright, we need to turnon the keyboard and mouse,which should be arather simple task.Mmm, this clicks really nice.Me gusta.Oh, okay, this is workin'.That's workin', okay, good, yes.English!My favorite.♪ This is beautiful ♪These are going on eBay,this, and the freakin'keyboard, are goin' oneBay for a lotta bucks.I don't think they're goingfor as much as they werewhen the iMac Pro firstcame out, but man,when Apple turns something blackit just never goes back andit goes way up in price,which I'm not against, Ithink that's cool, yeah.Gives you somethingto sell on eBay.We're gonna skip theinternet for now.I'm gonna have tomigrate a lot of data,but I'm not gonnashow you all that,that's not really necessary.I'm just gonna set up a genericuser account to begin with.We don't really need to migrateall that stuff right now.The password is, one,two, three, four,five, six, seven, eight, nine,and they will neversee it coming.So while that's loading,here are my plans:What I really wanna dois test out the speakerson this thing because theyprobably sound amazing,but the other thing that I mightsave for a little bit lateris I wanna do a speed test.I wanna see how fastthis thing really is.So stick around for that.Sure, we'll do the'express settings' for nowbecause I'm probably justchange 'em all anyway.Look at that 14core performance.It really shines right here.Look at how well thatgraphic rendered.The Vega reallydrives those pixels.♪ Duh-duh-duh! ♪♪ 5k! ♪Beautiful 5k screen, let's seewhat we got in this bad boy.I say \"bad boy\" a lot,is that just a thing?I dunno...We have a 2.5 Ghz Intel Xeon W,128 gigs of RAM, anda Radeon Pro Vega 64with 16 gigs of video memory.This is the fastestcomputer I've ever touched.Number of cores: 14.Right!So it is a 14 core systemwith 128 gigs of RAM,two freakin' terabytesof super-fast storage.That is amazing.Alright.Right!So I think the speakers,considering this is a reallythin all-in-one computer,are pretty good!Yeah!(loud electronic music)And for a final personal touch,and boom goes the turpentine.That looks beautifulon that 5k display.Now before I saygoodbye to all of you,there is one thing left to do.I need to give mypersonal MacBook Pro,the thing that has beenwith me for over four years,a well-needed upgrade.It is now the MacBook Pro Pro.You know, as much asI love my photography,I think it's only fitting toshow the inkcloud wallpaperbecause that's kinda the imagethat this computeris marketed with.So anyway, awesome start.Now, is this thing reallyas fast as people say?That's what I'm gonna test ona future Krazy Ken episode.So stick around for that.But, beautiful computer,thanks for watching.And there's more tocome with this iMac Pro.Catch the crazy, and pass it on.(upbeat electronic outro music)\n"