**A Traditional English Pub Experience**

As we sat down at The French House, one of London's most iconic pubs, we couldn't help but feel a sense of excitement and anticipation. The atmosphere was lively, with the sound of laughter and conversation filling the air. Our host, Tom, had brought us here for a unique experience, and we were eager to see what the night had in store.

**A Delicious Barbecue**

Tom took us on a culinary journey through the traditional English pub food, starting with a barbecue that showcased the sweetness of grilled vegetables. "Doing it with the charcoal brings out so much sweetness in the vegetables," he said, as we watched him expertly grill English peas straight onto the grill. The moisture inside the peas steamed them to perfection, and we were all impressed by the simplicity yet elegance of this dish.

**A Cornish Delight**

Next up was a Cornish delicacy that had us all intrigued - barbecued chiros. We watched in awe as Tom devoured these crispy, flavorful treats, and couldn't help but wonder what made them so special. "It's yeah, delicious," he said, with a grin, "and it's one of our specialties here at The French House."

**Midget Porn and Mischief**

But the evening took an unexpected turn when Tom started watching midget porn on his phone. We were all taken aback, but Tom just laughed it off, saying that it was a funny way to start the night. "I think, to become a regular here, you've got to really like earning it," he joked. It was clear that The French House had a reputation for being a bit of a wild card.

**A Mescal Margarita Fueled Night**

As the night wore on, we found ourselves getting drunker and more rowdy. Tom pulled out a bottle of mescal margaritas, and we spent the next hour drinking and laughing together. It was clear that this was a night to remember, and one that would stay with us for a long time.

**A Visit to The French House**

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, we arrived at our destination - The French House. Tom had promised us a special experience, and we were eager to see what the night had in store. As we entered the pub, we were greeted by the warm atmosphere and the sound of laughter from the patrons.

**A Pig's Tale**

Tom took us on a journey through the world of pigs, showcasing two-year-old pigs that had been raised with care and attention. "Let's get in the restaurant mate," he said, as we made our way to the table. The pig, it seemed, was quite the star of the show.

**A Delicious Menu**

Our meal at The French House was a culinary tour de force, featuring dishes such as sourdough bread pan-fried in a little bit of dripping, ox cheek that had been smoked for eight hours or so, and pickled shiitake mushrooms. It was clear that Tom knew his stuff when it came to food.

**A Conversation with the Chef**

As we sat down to eat, Tom took us on a tour of the kitchen, explaining each dish in detail. "Yes, yes, yes, oh, you dirty bastard," he said, as he expertly chopped an onion for our salad. It was clear that Tom had a passion for cooking, and that his love for food shone through in every dish.

**A Special Request**

As we finished our meal, Tom made a special request - "Can I just remind you all that you're being filmed?" he said with a grin. We were all taken aback, but Tom just laughed it off, saying that it was part of the experience.

**A Night to Remember**

In the end, our night at The French House was one that we would never forget. From the delicious food to the mescal margaritas, and from the pigs to the midget porn - it was a night that had it all. As Tom said, "I think there's absolutely no chance of this happening again," but we knew that we would always treasure the memories of our time at The French House.

"WEBVTTKind: captionsLanguage: enThree Legs Manolita,coming in the kitchen.>> .>> To see Tom Adams.>> Yeah, basically with akitchen so small we gottado a night shift, we callit a moonshine shift toget everything preppedfor the next day.It's a bit of an odd one,working through thenight, butchering pigs,but just kindagot it done.Rosie, you everseen a pig dick?>> That looks like yours,wasn't it?>> .>> What can youdo with that?>> My name's Tom Adams.I'm the owner ofPitt Cue in Soho.We specialize inreally good meat andreally good cocktails.Started as food trailer.It was pretty simple.We had a smoker anda grill.That's all broughtus to a restaurant.>> This is homemademutton sausage withpickled shallots andhomemade yogurt.And this is the chickentruffle sausage withfresh summer truffles..>> We basicallyjust wanna getawesome stuffinto the kitchen.We're now, like,farming our own pigs.And that's made a bigdifference to the,to the kitchen andthe menu.>> Morning.Say hi Goldilocks.No your face,not your ass.>> I've been obsessedwith pigs for a while.>> Wild pigs.>> I bought some pigsstarting with somemiddle whites.I treated themlike goddesses.I used to buy themfresh peaches,fed them on whey andall the cheese wheyfrom the dairy nearby.I had cobnuts.I hemorrhaged mybank account.I used to like give thembelly rubs every day.And then, like one day,when I firstbutchered the pig.Cooked it straightthere and then.It was like, probablythe best moment I've had.Like in a, in, in,maybe in life actually.When we startedrearing the pigs,we obviously have touse the entire thing.Otherwise you're notreally respecting what'sgoing on, on the farm.So we have a whole pigand you have two jowls.You gotta use them.We grind it 24 hours,we smoke it, andthen we pressit super hard.There's quitea lot fats this issqueezing some of it out.So we put this about25 kilos on the top,just to pressit all down.And that'sthe jowl prepped.It's all nice andcrispy on the top.That's not the skin.This is the fatthat's crispy.Oh fuck, I've forgottento grill the pineapple.It's pickled pineapple.We're gonna grill it.There's something reallysatisfying about sendingout just a pork chop andknowing it's awesome.That's pickled pineapple,jowl, andthen just finish it withsome of this sauce.It's super, super easy.Well we're gonna havea drink upstairs.So, something prettystrong I think to start.>> Cheers.Cheers, cheers, cheers.>> Argh, I've gotthe dribbles already.>> Cheers cheers cheers.>> See you in a bit guys.Me Swanny, Danny.Swanny is like right handman at the restaurant.Danny is currently,pretty much managesthe whole restaurant.We're gonna out to Koya,see Giles.Koya, I think is like ourfavorite restaurantin town.It's incredible.So, so good.Know like, I wassaying earlier how Iwasn't gonna get pissed..>> You're already pissed.>> Do you ever drinkafter service?Your, you will be inpieces after an hour.>> Pieces, pieces.>> Pieces.>> We'll be inpieces in an hour.>> Pieces in an hour.>> We have a footin tradition,in Japanese tradition.It's uncomplicated.There's no trickery.It's straightforward andit's honest.The noodlesare made every day.Made downstairsin the dungeons.And kneaded tirelessly byfoot for an hour or so.It's a hustle andbustle noodle restaurant.Chefs like tocome here because theycan be a part of that.And they're notfussed over at all.>> Well,we eat here a lot.Everything's sofresh, staff amazing,chef's awesome.It's just,it's just quitea perfect restaurant.Goose cheese, sun firedtomatoes, tomato juice.Mm, we'll have toblur out the tattoo,cuz his mum doesn'tknow he's got it yet..>> .>> Get pissed.>> You bet.This is my goodfriend Lee.It's good seeing him.Oh, I was expectingsnacks at Koya.Like just a coupleof things.But Giles,Giles went to town.We had like the wholemenu and then some.It was, it was awesome.>> Thank you very much.>> This is us.>> That's not a cab,I could've fitthe entire staff inhere what the fuck?We're going to head outto Climpson's, see Tom.Tom used to workat The River Cafe.He said he's got a saladcalled, like grilled peasin a pod with loads ofherbs and I just findthe logistics of grillinga pea quite troublesome.If you try togrill an individual peayou're absolutely fucked.If person onthe grill will startusing a tweezer, I'm out.>> I've seen tweezersin your kitchen.>> What's that?>> I've seentweezers in your kitchen.>> For masturbation.For milking.>> To milk the.>> Formilking my udders when Istart to geta little bit.>> Climpson's isa coffee brewery.They have a littleoutside area that hascouple of woodfire ovens.>> .>> This isFarmer Charlie.He's like two hours late.Farmer Charlie hasa farm in Cornwall.Where all the pigsthat come tothe restaurant are.>> We run in pigtime in Cornwall.>> Yeah,he runs on pig time.>> What's Charlie like?>> Cause farm life is sodifferent fromLondon life,.>> He just urinateseverywhere.>> Okay,I'm spending a week onthe farm next week,holiday.When I last tried toleave the farm, I wasjust leaving I was justdriving back to London.I was trying to leave sohe just peed on everysingle door car handle.So I like, I went tothe driver's seat, andhe was walking around,like,following mewith his pee.These are duck heartsgoing on here.We've got some newseasoned corn, andchiros here.I've gently smoked andcooked through.There's people that likepig, who barbecue andpulled porkAmerican-style reallywell.So I leave that up tothem and I just try anddo like a charcoal.Everything you know,is grilled.It's not where you beeating traditionalbarbecue.There's lots ofvegetables outhere that grow.Doing it with thecharcoal brings out somuch sweetness inthe vegetables.It's yeah, delicious.This you know,these are English peas.We just grill themlike as they are.Just straighton the grill.Then the moistureinside the peaskinda steams them andcooks them just enough.Grilled vegetables,almost nicer thanmeat in a way.Barbecued sweet corn,barbecued chiros, andbarbecued duck hearts.>> .>> There's summertruffle on top as well.How's this stuff?>> Really good.>> And he's watchingmidget porn.>> .>> Is thisa Cornish thing?>> .>> A guy is watchingmidget porn anda guy is eatingchiros andyou look atthe midget porn.That's fucked up.>> I never watchmidget porn.I don't watchmidget porn.>> I reallylove this dish,this is really beautiful.>> I love the dish, butI love the midget porn..>> Can I justremind you allthat you're being filmed?.>> We definitelystarted gettingdrunk by that point.Mescal margaritas,yeah, yeah.I remember holdingquite a campdrink at one point..>> Can I haveanother margarita?>> Sowhere are we going man?>> We're going to leMaison du Francais.>> The French House.>> Tom you've gottoo many friends.>> I'm the log man.I have wood foryou..>> Then we got toThe French House.The French House is oneof the most amazing pubsin London, for sure.>> Who are werefilming here, andwhat are you filming?>> Midget porn..>> I think, to becomea regular there,become known in there,you've got to really,like, earn it.I think you probablyneed 20 years drinking inthere to earn that right.He just literallystarted peeing on me.>> .>> Charlie did youjust pee on Tom?>> No.>> You saw it as well.>> Testify.>> .>> Holy Christmas cakes.>> We're drinkingCidre Breton.>> We usuallydrink this ona Sunday nightwhen we're here..Cheers, cheers,cheers, cheers, cheers...>> Let's go.>> Where are we going?Where are we going?>> To the restaurant.I need some food.A little drink.A tiny drink.A small drink.Let's go.Let's go.Change in restaurant.>> So a pig is like,this big.I guess.I mean, they,it's hard toget the shape.>> Let's get inthe restaurant mate.>> The pig, the pigs,the pigs are liketwo years old.>> Let's get inthe restaurant.I just,I can't take that drink.This sourdough, which wepan fry in a little bitof a little bit dripping.And we're going totake some bone marrow.The bone marrow hasbeen has been whipped.With some garlic parsleysalt and, lemon juice.Ox cheek that's beensmoked for eight hours orso, cooked it down in,in stout and it's superdelicious and rich.A few chives.Chives are veryimportant.Pickled shiitake.And we take somedelicious onions that wejust pickled ina light beer.>> Yes, yes, yes, oh,you dirty bastard.>> So tell us whatyou're cooking whilstyou're doing it.I thought I justneed to get my bearings.Add at the moment littlebit of France oh.>> .>> I think it wentdown all right.I caught one holy shit..I got a picture on myphone of Farmer Charliejust with his top off.I'm going down tothe farm for four days.I need to restafter that.There's absolutely nochance that'shappening again.Any pig jokes?>> Pig jokes, yes.>> Pigs aren't a joke.\n"