The Video Prepared to Film Today, But Not Today

I had a video prepared to film today that was photography-related, but I just don't feel that's the right thing to put out today. Considering the horrible things that happened in my hometown last night, I have to prioritize this over any other content. Many of you know that I am from Dallas, and I live in Fort Worth now, which is about 35 miles away from downtown Dallas. It's a sister city, it's in the Metroplex, but I've been here since the last fall. Prior to that, I've lived my entire life in Dallas.

I was born and raised there, and the area where these police shootings happened last night downtown Dallas is not very big and within just a mile or two, or sometimes all that. I mean, I went to high school down there, I went to Booker T Washington, I worked at the Dallas Museum of Art for seven years, and I lived in Deep Ellum which is just right on the other side of the highway for over 10 years.

Trying to get my head around this and make sense out of something that makes no sense watching this unfold on television is horrible. The events that led up to this are horrible; they don't make any sense, and it wasn't just the two events in the last couple days, it goes way back. Trying to figure out what's wrong with all of this and try to put the pieces together doesn't make sense, none of it does.

But just to kind of express to you how personal this felt to me, for those of you who live in urban areas, you know that what comes with living downtown is usually there are crime problems, there are homeless problems, and police are a part of that community. A big part of that community. There are people that you know you live on their beat, there are people that live in your building. I had five cops during the time that I was there that lived in my building; two of them were my neighbors.

When you have faces that you associate with policemen and by the way they come in every gender, they come in every race and every size and every age, I have the utmost respect for the Dallas Police. This was really hard to watch. Sorry, my thoughts aren't all together even; when you know these people as faces, you know them in life, and you see that these people don't do this for the money; they don't get paid a lot. They do it because they get off of work, and you can get called back at any time. It's a very thankless job, they work very hard at it to protect and serve, and they all know the risk you put your life on the line to protect the people that you're working with.

And none of this makes sense. The only thing I want to add to all of this is just an observation. It seems to be a current thing that we all live with today; we're in an age that is division, and I don't think it's just locally. I think it's nationally, I think it's globally. It's teams, like you're particularly politically, you're on this side or you're on that side, and whatever side you're on, the other side is evil; they're the bad guy; they can do no right. And it blows my mind that the media perpetuates this.

I understand the political nature of it, I understand that the media is selling advertising ultimately, and they need stories and they want you to watch them and click on them and all that. But I still blow my mind at how often we're treated to racial incidents like these. It's like where are we? Who are we? I mean, this doesn't make any sense. I can deny it all I want or chastise it all I want, but it's there, and it seems like it's them or us all the time. And it needs to be; we need to be common people together.

I guess this is not new in the history of the world, but it just blows my mind that we don't move beyond this at some point. But really, to see five police killed last night in my hometown hits home, and I'm sorry that this isn't a happy interesting photography thing today; it's what it is. And I just wanted to put that out there and take a minute to just think about all of this.

"WEBVTTKind: captionsLanguage: enI had a video prepared to film today um that was photography related but I just don't feel that that's the right thing to put out today um considering the horrible things that happened in my hometown last night um many of you know that I am from Dallas I live in Fort Worth now which is about 35 miles away from downtown Dallas it's a sister city it's in the Metroplex but I've been here since the last fall but previous to that I've lived my entire life in Dallas uh I was born and raised there um the area where these police shootings happened last night downtown Dallas it's not very big and within just a mile or two or sometimes in all that I mean I went to high school down there I went to Booker T Washington I worked at the Dallas Museum of Art for seven years and I lived in Deep Ellum which is just right on the other side of the highway for over 10 years and trying to get my head around this and make sense out of something that makes no sense um watching this unfold on television is horrible um the events that led up to this are horrible they don't make any sense and it wasn't just the two events in the last couple days it goes way back um trying to figure out what is wrong with all of this and try to put the pieces together doesn't make sense none of it does um but just to kind of express to you how personal this felt to me um for those of you who live in urban areas you know and I liveed downtown for a long time uh you know that what what comes with that is usually there are crime problems um there are homeless problems there and police are a part of that Community a big part of that community and there are people that you know you live on their beat um there are people that live in your building I had five cops during the time that I was there that lived in in my building two of them were my neighbors and when you have faces that you associate with policemen and by the way they come in every gender they come in every race and they come in every size and every age um I have the utmost respect for the Dallas Police and this was really hard to watch um sorry my thoughts aren't all together even um when you know these people as faces you you you know them in life and and you see that these people don't do this for the money they don't get paid a lot um they do it I you they get off of work and you can get called back at any time it's a very thankless job they work very hard at it to protect and serve and they all know the risk you put your life on the line to protect the people that you're working with and none of this makes sense um the only thing I want to add to all of this is just an observation um it seems to be a current thing that we all live with today um we're in an age that is division um and I don't think it's just locally I think it's nationally I think it's globally um it's teams it's like you're particularly politically you're on this side or you're on that side and whatever side you're on the other side is evil they're the bad guy they can do no right and it blows my mind that the media perpetuates this um I understand the political nature of it um I understand that the media is selling advertising ultimately and they need stories and they want you to watch them and click on them and all that um I blows my mind that that this occurs racially in 2016 it's like where are we who are we I mean this doesn't I mean I can deny it all I want or or or chastise it all I want but it's there and it seems like it's them or us all the time and it needs to be we it needs to be common people together and I guess this is not new in the history of the world but it just I guess it just blows my mind that we don't move beyond that at some point but really to see five police uh killed last night in my hometown um just hits home and I'm sorry that this isn't a happy interesting photography thing today but it is what it is and I just wanted to put that out there and uh take a minute to just think about all this and um that's all I got until the next video I'll see you all then laterI had a video prepared to film today um that was photography related but I just don't feel that that's the right thing to put out today um considering the horrible things that happened in my hometown last night um many of you know that I am from Dallas I live in Fort Worth now which is about 35 miles away from downtown Dallas it's a sister city it's in the Metroplex but I've been here since the last fall but previous to that I've lived my entire life in Dallas uh I was born and raised there um the area where these police shootings happened last night downtown Dallas it's not very big and within just a mile or two or sometimes in all that I mean I went to high school down there I went to Booker T Washington I worked at the Dallas Museum of Art for seven years and I lived in Deep Ellum which is just right on the other side of the highway for over 10 years and trying to get my head around this and make sense out of something that makes no sense um watching this unfold on television is horrible um the events that led up to this are horrible they don't make any sense and it wasn't just the two events in the last couple days it goes way back um trying to figure out what is wrong with all of this and try to put the pieces together doesn't make sense none of it does um but just to kind of express to you how personal this felt to me um for those of you who live in urban areas you know and I liveed downtown for a long time uh you know that what what comes with that is usually there are crime problems um there are homeless problems there and police are a part of that Community a big part of that community and there are people that you know you live on their beat um there are people that live in your building I had five cops during the time that I was there that lived in in my building two of them were my neighbors and when you have faces that you associate with policemen and by the way they come in every gender they come in every race and they come in every size and every age um I have the utmost respect for the Dallas Police and this was really hard to watch um sorry my thoughts aren't all together even um when you know these people as faces you you you know them in life and and you see that these people don't do this for the money they don't get paid a lot um they do it I you they get off of work and you can get called back at any time it's a very thankless job they work very hard at it to protect and serve and they all know the risk you put your life on the line to protect the people that you're working with and none of this makes sense um the only thing I want to add to all of this is just an observation um it seems to be a current thing that we all live with today um we're in an age that is division um and I don't think it's just locally I think it's nationally I think it's globally um it's teams it's like you're particularly politically you're on this side or you're on that side and whatever side you're on the other side is evil they're the bad guy they can do no right and it blows my mind that the media perpetuates this um I understand the political nature of it um I understand that the media is selling advertising ultimately and they need stories and they want you to watch them and click on them and all that um I blows my mind that that this occurs racially in 2016 it's like where are we who are we I mean this doesn't I mean I can deny it all I want or or or chastise it all I want but it's there and it seems like it's them or us all the time and it needs to be we it needs to be common people together and I guess this is not new in the history of the world but it just I guess it just blows my mind that we don't move beyond that at some point but really to see five police uh killed last night in my hometown um just hits home and I'm sorry that this isn't a happy interesting photography thing today but it is what it is and I just wanted to put that out there and uh take a minute to just think about all this and um that's all I got until the next video I'll see you all then later\n"