The Art of Boat-Building and Sailing with Jeremy and Friends

Jeremy was the first to arrive at the boat-building project, eager to put his plan into action. He had originally intended to simply bolt a large outboard engine to the back of a pick-up truck, but things didn't quite work out as expected. The truck rolled over, rendering the setup unusable. To prevent this from happening again, Jeremy took matters into his own hands and welded up the doors much more thoroughly. This should now prevent water from entering the cockpit and causing it to slosh around.

With the doors secured, Jeremy turned his attention to the back of the boat. He had fitted large drums in place, which he could lower into the water when needed. These drums would serve as stabilizers, much like a child's bicycle. This addition was designed to provide more stability for Jeremy and his friends as they sailed across the water.

As Jeremy continued to work on the project, Hammond arrived on the scene. Hammond had taken a different approach to boat-building, parking a van on top of a boat. While this may seem unconventional, it was actually a refinement of an earlier theory. The flying bridge, as Hammond called it, was equipped with everything Jeremy needed to navigate the water.

However, there were still some issues that needed to be addressed. Richard, who had been working on a similar project, had stuck with the cabin cruiser principle. He had fixed a propeller to the Volkswagen's rear-mounted engine, which he could use to propel the vehicle through the water. However, this setup presented its own set of problems.

When driving down the road, the propeller would spin, causing the vehicle to lose stability. Jeremy and Hammond were both surprised by this issue, especially considering that it was designed to be a blender-like effect on the back of the car. To make matters worse, there were holes in the hull of the boat, which Jeremy had sealed around the arch with foam.

Despite these setbacks, Jeremy remained optimistic about his project. He showed off his handiwork, including a small fire that had resulted from welding. This blaze was quickly extinguished, but it highlighted the potential risks associated with boat-building. Meanwhile, James arrived at the scene, looking rather flustered. It seemed that he had encountered some similar issues with his own boat-building project.

James had attempted to build a boat using a car as its foundation. However, this plan had not panned out as expected. The mast kept collapsing, and other components were not functioning properly. James was relieved to find that Jeremy's boat was more stable, thanks to the addition of a collapsible mast and a spinnaker.

The group spent some time discussing their respective projects and sharing their experiences. It was clear that each of them had faced unique challenges in building their boats. However, with their combined knowledge and expertise, they were confident that they could overcome any obstacles that came their way. As Jeremy put it, "It just won't sink." But only time would tell if this was truly the case.

"WEBVTTKind: captionsLanguage: enJeremy was the first to arrive.There we are. Now, obviously,my original plan of simply boltinga very large outboard engineto the back of a pick-up truck workedvery well... until it rolled over.So, to prevent that happening again,what I've doneis I've welded up the doorsmuch more thoroughly this time.That should stop watergetting into the cockpitand sloshing from side to side.In the back, I've fitted these big drums,which, when I go in the water,I simply lower them like this...so they're like sort of stabiliserson a child's bicycle.And that should give me more...-Stability.-Yes, that.Next, Hammond arrived.-Now...-Yeah!-Now, you see, Hammond...-Yes.What you've done there, mate...is you've parked a van on top of a boat.No, no, it's brilliant. Let me tell you.It is a refinement of the theory.Check it out, flying bridge,completely equipped.-It's not a flying bridge.-More-or-less.And this is where the girls go.-Up here, in bikinis.-Richard, I'm already seeing the problem.-Would you like to step down.-Yes.-Stand at the wheel.-Yes.-Look ahead.-Yeah, that is an issue.I didn't discover it until...I need a box. I need a sailing box.As before, Richard had stuckwith the cabin cruiser principle.And, as before,to make it move in the water,he'd simply fixed a propellerto the Volkswagen's rear-mounted engine.So, as you're driving down the road,-this propeller is turning?-A bit.Have you rung the highways departmentand told themyou're driving a carwith, effectively, a blender on the back?And there was another issue.-This is your hull.-Yes, it is.-These are holes in it.-Fibreglass. They are.-That's for the wheels.-I've seen Titanic.-Got a hole in it, sank.-Well, no.I've sealed themaround the arch with foam.I see. So, if Titanic had been filledwith foam, it would've been here today.But they didn't know that.You can't knock them for that.Fibreglass hull, predominantly.Barely tips the scales at over five tons.-And the cooling?-Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah, there's that.Jeremy then showed off his handiwork.-You've set fire to it by the looks of it.-There was a small fire. The welding.-Oh, yeah.-And then, while waiting for James...Oh, again, ambitious.So, you're thinking of what to occupyyourself with whilst on the water.-Whilst you sink again.-No, not this time.-It will.-It won't.-It will.-It won't.-It will.-It just won't.Some time, much later,James arrived in a flurry of déjà vu.-It's the same vehicle.-The same car.-Well, not exactly.-No, exactly the same car.It is the same car and the reason for thatis, my car, if you remember, worked.It didn't. Every time you gotto a low bridge, your mast was...-That did happen.-Ah! Now I have a collapsible mast.And I have a spinnakerand I also have a keel-come-centre-board.How did you get that underneath here?You drop it down through the slot,like you do on a dinghy.That's a whopper!This won't work.We'd soon find out.-Thank you so much. Here's our challenge.-Come on, then.-Is it bad?-Yes.-No, really bad.-Go on.\"You will now drive to... Dover.\"No. Not...\"And then you will crossthe Channel to France.\"-That's the sea.-That's...-What is it, 22 miles?-He's not making it up.Mine won't do that.Here we go.Let's go!This is absolutely brilliant!I'm actually using my weightto counter the roll of the craft.That's choppy out there.I can't do that... not in a van!Mate, it's horrible!-Maybe if we snuck up on it...-Yeah.Sneak up on the sea!That's brilliant.Meanwhile, back with Captain Pugwash...Sod it!Right, now, sail.We were leaving the harbour.You can't see what's coming, I can!I can just see sky, sea, sky, sea...Whoa! My God, this is big now!Quite scared! Quite scared!Quite... really scared.Why the bloody hell won't it turn round?Ow... thing.Whoa, it's coming through the sun roof.I'm going to try and turn.Bloody hell!These are quite big.-Don't like that.-Don't turn on a wave!Wait... or something.I don't know! I got scared!Oh, my God.No, no, no!In seas like this, and with my puny power,I bravely decidedto head back to the harbour.Then Jeremy bravely followed suit.Mayday!Is it not working well, James?Have you ever heard of the milkof human kindness?Well, prepare to suckle on it.Thank you.Sorry, mate.Today the wind had droppedand the sea was much calmer.We're going to France this time.We are going.I was now powered by an outboard I'dbought from Jeremy for a million pounds,and James was my cabin boy.If you would go below, please, cabin boy,-And a cup of tea.-Righto, sir.Oi, Prescott!I'll have a bacon sandwich.Richard's million-pound outboardwasn't exactly gutsy,so, in the spirit of the seaand in keeping of the maritime code,I gunned it and left them behind.Oh, she's riding the waves like a twig.Meanwhile, back on the cabin cruiser...-Bloody hell! Mate?-What?There's quite a lot of water.It's up to...Oh, not again.This is the third timeI've been in this ruddy sea.Yeah. Technically, it wasn't my fault.I'm disappointed,.I thought we were going to make it.Oh, sorry, mate, the cup sank.With typical good grace,Jeremy came back to pick us upand then announcedwe'd have to go back to Dover.This seemed like a waste of time,but as we lined up for our fourth attempt,his reasoning became clear.A couple of years ago,Richard Branson set a recordfor crossing the Channelin an amphibious car.One hour, 40 minutes, six seconds.And?No way!It's an average speed of 10.8 knots.-So, we go for it? We give it a shot?-In Calais for lunch.Beardy, you're going down!Bloody hell! What do we do now?I can't remember whose right of way it is.I think that's on a constant bearing aswell, which means we're going to hit it.Oh, God, no!-I'm quite...-Reckon I'll maybe go behind it.-Yeah, I'd go behind it.-Yeah, yeah, I think behind it is best.Having missed all the big, scary boats,we turned our attentionback to Branson's record.Ready, ready... one hour 40 minutescoming up... now!We've failed!We lost!The town of Sangatte was aboutto get three more immigrants.Never mind that we'd aimed for Calaisand missed. France is France.Come on! Come on!We're 20 yards from France.To succeed,we had to get up the boat ramp,but that meant going through the breakers.No!Where's that come from?I really thoughtwe were going to tip over.We're on the rocks.We're going up the beach now.Skilfully, James got a roperound the front bumperand then, a gap in the waves,I went for it.No!That's good.The pick-up had landed.\n"